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Singing Tutor 4.1.5

Filesize: 1.31 MB
License: Shareware
Price: $19
Limitations: Free to Try
OS: Windows XP,Windows 2000,Windows 98,Windows Me,Windows NT
Requirements: IBM PC - 486, 300 MHz, RAM 16MB or more; Sound card (mono mode)
Homepage: http://www.vimas.com
Download

With Singing tutor you can: Improve your singing skill, tune musical instruments, measure voice tone, sing with mp3 song background and see your singing accuracy, listen your voice interpreted as a MIDI instrument. See the nearest music note to your voice tone. Sing some known melody, and Singing Tutor will show you how to play this melody with a piano or other keyboard instrument. Record and listen your own voice in wav format. Select several notes from the pitch range and test your singing in the selected diapason. Impartial Singing Tutor will help you to estimate your abilities and develop your singing skills. Singing Tutor idea is simple. Each note has a defined pitch frequency. The higher note has the higher frequency and vise versa. Singing Tutor allows to measure the pitch frequency of the voice or music, with high precision, and to compare it with pitch frequency of the reference note. Interesting fact: not everyone knows how to sing well. But peoples without musical training can not understand what is wrong. Among musicians it called by mysterious word - ear for music.

This "musical ear" provides some subculture divide everyone into people who have it not. Nevertheless, ear for music can be evolved. Actually musical ear is just an ability to distinguish sounds of close height. Singing Tutor is wonderful voice tone measurer. Its measure accuracy more than enough to discern sounds, which very close to each other. From that standpoint, he has a great musical ear. It immediately displays your voice tone, and the nearest musical note. So you can adjust your voice, making it slightly above or below. Also it can sing in harmony with you, playing nearest note your voice. In such a way Singing Tutor discover mystery musical ear. And giving you an excellent opportunity to learn sing better.

Star Baritone Discusses Singing As 'Cyrano' For Upcoming Opera Company Production

By Lewis Whittington, The Bulletin

Philadelphia - When baritone Marian Pop was contemplating a career as a violinist in Romania, he so disliked the stage that he thought he would quit pursuing music performance as a career.

That was then. Now playing on opera stages and in concert halls around the world, the singer's stage jitters have vanished. "I love it," he said in an interview last week. He will get the chance to display that love and his cinematic stage presence while debuting as the title role in the Opera Company of Philadelphia's premiere of "Cyrano." His image as the prominently schnozzled hero adorns show banners along Broad Street.

The new opera, a coproduction of OCP and Michigan Opera Theatre, had a short world premiere in Detroit last fall. Based on Edmond Rostand's 1897 play "Cyrano de Bergerac," this ariatic version is the creation of composer David DiChiera, a founding director of MOT, and librettist Bernard Uzan, who is directing the production.

The story of Cyrano, renowned for his large, unironic proboscis, has remained one of the most enduring romantic characters around, and has been memorialized in several stage and screen productions, including Steve Martin's 1987 film, "Roxanne."

This is great raw material for opera: "Cyrano's problem is that he hates himself," says Mr. Pop. "Everybody who has a complex - you say that in English, yes? - develops other things to compensate."

Cyrano overcomes ridicule about his large nose by becoming a great swordfighter, writer and poet, but gets both physically hurt while swordfighting, and emotionally bruised as the hidden suitor of Roxane. He vicariously woos Roxane by writing her beautiful letters, used by her hopelessly tongue-tied suitor Christian to make her fall in love with him. But Christian is clueless about how to win her heart without Cyrano's letters, and Roxane has no idea that Cyrano is the author of the beautiful prose.

Mr. Pop, sounding a little gravely, dashed through a Friday morning downpour to grab a bite before rehearsal, and talk about what it takes to build a convincing Cyrano. He kicked back at the Cosi down the street from the Academy.

"This is very friendly and safe place," he said with a laugh, as things bang ominously in the background. "I love this city; it's a beautiful place, and I also have some relatives here. This opera house looks like the houses I am used to in Europe."

Between productions of "Cyrano," Mr. Pop did some freelance work, taking two months off to perform concerts in Romania's capital city and other locations in Europe.

"In Bucharest, I did 'The Barber of Seville,' because they had never heard me there. In St. Petersburg, I did 'Carmina Burana,'" he said. "It's great working with different people, artists, mentalities."

Originally from Cluj Napoca (Kloozh' Nah poh' kah) in Transylvania, the baritone has a silky Eastern European accent, and once even shot an opera film in the ruins of Castle Dracula.

While practicing for the heroic role last week, Mr. Pop bruised the back of his hand, but was relishing the thought of returning for more swashbuckling and the chance to sharpen the vocal subtleties of the role.

"Cyrano is fearless," said Mr. Pop, who says he like to consider how a character arrived at a certain point in his life, which affects how he expresses himself onstage. "I like to bring as much physical knowledge as possible to a part."

Soprano Evelyn Pollock will be joining Mr. Pop on stage as Roxane and Stephen Costello, an AVA graduate who made his debut at The Met in 2007, will play Christian. "Evelyn is an absolutely great singer, and Stephen is going to be one of our best tenors. I feel honored being around these great voices," said Mr. Pop.

Mr. Pop is looking forward to this stage of the opera's development. "In Detroit, we had to do everything from scratch -from nothing - and now we are much further. The main parts are big, [but] now we are pretty much ready for it," he said. "Our director wrote the libretto and knows it by heart. He communicates to us want he wants in an instant. We are lucky to have a director who knows language. He made a point from the very beginning that we would work together to develop these characters," said Mr. Pop.

"'Cyrano' is written in a romantic style, but musically it has a rhythmic element in the bars. It's one of the characteristics of David DiChiera's composing style," said Mr. Pop. "It keeps the singer awake and gives a spontaneity to the actors. It's more like a movie style, in the opera you expect when they are going to start the musicality. Here, it feels like the action of the character starts the music. It took me a while to realize this. I love that."

The Opera Company of Philadelphia's East Coast premiere of "Cyrano" opens at the Academy of Music Friday, and runs through Feb. 17. Tickets are $7.50 to $115, and can be purchased by calling 215 732-8400.

Lewis Whittington can be reached at lwhitti284@aol.com

The singing telegram at 75

Although there is no record of the content of the inaugural message, today marks the 75th anniversary of singing telegrams, or musical telegrams as they were originally called, the first of which was delivered by the New York-based Postal Telegraph Company on Feb. 10, 1933.

A mid-Depression marketing ploy to make its messengers stand out from the competition's, the company hired musicians who would play appropriate music while recipients read their telegrams. Another motive behind musical telegrams was to supplant the public's association of telegrams with bad news -- the death of a loved one, for example -- with something more cheerful.

One of the most famous early telegrams was the first one ever delivered by Western Union, on July 28 of the same year. The story goes that a fan of singer Rudy Vallee sent him a birthday greeting telegram, and the company's public relations director, George P. Oslin, asked one of the operators, Lucille Lipps, to sing the message over the phone, to the tune of Happy Birthday to You. (The part about the original sender may be apocryphal, as some reports suggest that the whole idea originated with Oslin, who was allegedly a friend of Vallee's. Oslin's story became such legend, in fact, that he is often credited with inventing singing telegrams.) Oslin later recalled he "was angrily informed I was making a laughingstock of the company."

Yet singing telegrams, which were generally delivered in person, grew in popularity until the increasing prevalence of telephones in homes saw the novelty wear off.

In Canada, the singing telegram died around 1950, when Unitel Communications, the modern-day equivalent of Western Union, ceased sending them. Western Union halted its singing telegram service in the U.S. in 1974.

India Catholics set world record for 40 hour singing marathon

Mangalore, India


Catholics in southwestern India have set a new world record by singing non-stop for 40 hours, UCA News reports.

Priests, religious, and laypeople started singing on January 27, managing to eclipse the previous 36-hour record set by a Brazilian Christian group in 2004.

The record-setters sang in the Konkani language, currently spoken by about 5 million people. The language is largely associated with Catholics on the southwestern coast of India.

Eric Ozario, founder of the Konkani cultural organization Mandd Sobhann, told that the aim of the project was to instill a sense of unity and solidarity among Kokani-speaking people. “We are a small community and Westernization is eating away our culture,” he said. The Konkani community could grow "only when it is united, culturally rooted and proud of its culture." Ozario said some Konkani-speaking Catholics have turned to an “English culture, forgetting their rich cultural roots.”

"Konkani language and our Catholic faith are linked to each other, and we cannot separate one from the other," Sister Juliet Lobo, a Queen of Apostles nun who helped conduct the performance.

Sister Lobo said about 1,700 singers in 44 groups sang continuously, with less than ten seconds between songs and between singing groups. While the singers mostly came from Catholic parishes in the Indian states of Goa, Maharashtra, and Kerala, some Konaki-speaking Catholics from Persian Gulf countries were also included.

They sang over 600 Christian hymns or faith-related songs. No song was repeated and no singer appeared more than once. The groups providing musical accompaniment changed every four hours.

Keith Pullin, an official from Guinness World Records, monitored the performance. He said he was "amazed by the discipline of the groups, their performance and the professionalism" of the event.

Father Ramesh Naik, a Mumbai parish priest who was the event’s chief patron, said the Konkani culture had played a major role in shaping faith and culture. “It has to be preserved,” he said.

Autisic student handcuffed for singing

-SAN FRANCISCO, California (NBC)

The parents of an autistic San Jose, California sixth-grader are expressing outrage that their son was put in handcuffs because he would not leave a class.

Eleven year old Gunnar Moody said that it all started when he was singing a song while doing sit-ups in physical education class.

"She was like, 'Gunnar, you have to leave now.' I didn't do anything wrong. Why do I have to leave? Everyone else is being loud; why do I have to get in trouble?' Then she said it three more times and then she handcuffed me. And it was kind of humiliating because it was in front of all those kids and she was, like, picking me up and dragging me out," Gunnar said.

Gunnar's parents said, what happened at Bret Harte Middle School is unacceptable.

"The bottom line he's in phys ed. And all the kids are making noise yelling, screaming and talking and he gets singled out for going 'la-la-la?'" Michael Moody, Gunnar's father, said.

His mother, Laura Moody, asked a campus police officer if Gunnar had threatened anyone.

"I specifically asked the officer, 'did he threaten you?' She said no. I said, 'did he threaten any other child?' And she said no. I think there should be a better line drawn on what kind of force to use. And especially with children with disabilities," Laura Moody said.

A copy of Gunnar's behavior support plan outlines what to do if he misbehaves in school and does not include the use of physical force.

The San Jose Unified School District issued the following statement:

The officer's actions helped to maintain a safe atmosphere for the other 30 students in the class.

The use of restraints is extremely rare and would only be used when deemed absolutely necessary by the officer for the protection of the student and his other classmates.

Gunnar's parents plan to meet with school district leaders to talk about what happened.

Gunnar is suspended for three days.

Asked if he wants to go back to Bret Harte Middle School, Gunnar said, "No. Because the kids will like pick on me and stuff. Because of that happened."

36 Rules For Bands

1. Never start a trio with a married couple.
2. Your manager's not helping you. Fire him/her.
3. Before you sign a record deal, look up the word "recoupable" in the dictionary.
4. No one cares who you've opened for.\
5. A string section does not make your songs sound any more "important".
6. If your band has gone through more than 4 bass players, it's time to break up.
7. When you talk on stage you are never funny.
8. If you sound like another band, don't act like you're unfamiliar with their music ("Oh does Rage Against The Machine also do rap-rock with political lyrics?")
9. Asking a crowd how they're doing is just amplified small talk. Don't do it.
10. Don't say your video's being played if it's only on the Austin Music Network.
11. When you sign to a major label, claim to have inked the best contract ever. Mention "artistic freedom" and "a guaranteed 3 record deal".
12. When you get dropped insist that it was the worst contract ever and you asked to be let go.
13.Never name a song after your band.
14. Never name your band after a song.
15. When a drummer brings in his own songs and asks to perform one of them, begin looking for a new drummer IMMEDIATELY.
16. Never enter a "battle of the bands" contest. If you do you're already a loser.
17. Learn to recognize scary word pairings: "rock opera", "white rapper", "blues jam", "swing band", "open mike", etc.
18. Drummers can take off their shirts or they can wear gloves, but not both.
19. Listen, either break it to your parents or we will; it's rock 'n' roll, not a soccer game. They've gotta stop coming to your shows.
20. It's not a "showcase". It's a gig that doesn't pay.
21. No one cares that you have a web site.
22. Getting a tattoo is like sewing platform shoes to your feet.
23. Don't hire a publicist.
24. Playing in San Marcos & Alpine doesn't mean you're on tour.
25. Don't join a cover band that plays Bush songs. In fact, don't join a cover band.
26. Although they come in different styles and colours, electric guitars all sound the same. Why do you keep changing them between songs?
27. Don't stop your set to ask that beers be brought up. That's what girlfriends/boyfriends are for.("and/or lead singers!" -Timbo)
28. If you use a smoke machine your music sucks.
29. We can tell the difference between a professionally produced album cover and one you made with the iMac your mom got for Christmas.
30. Remember, if blues solos are so difficult, why can so many 16 year olds play them?
31. If you ever take a publicity photo, destroy it. You may never know where or when it will turn up.
32. Cut your hair, but do not shave your head.
33. Pierce your nose, but not your eyebrow.
34. Do not wear shorts onstage. Or a suit. Or a hat.
35. Rock oxymorons; "major label interest", "demo deal"," blues genius", "$500 guarantee", and "Fastball's second hit".
36. 3 things that are never coming back: a)gongs, b)headbands, and c)playing slide guitar with a beer bottle.

So, how many have YOU broken?

Let There Be Bass

In the beginning there was a bass. It was a Fender, probably a Precision, but it could have been a Jazz - nobody knows. Anyway, it was very old ... definitely pre-C.B.S.

And God looked down upon it and saw that it was good. He saw that it was very good in fact, and couldn't be improved on at all (though men would later try.) And so He let it be and He created a man to play the bass.

And lo the man looked upon the bass, which was a beautiful 'sunburst', and he loved it. He played upon the open E string and the note rang through the earth and reverberated throughout the firmaments (thus reverb came to be.) And it was good. And God heard that it was good and He smiled at his handiwork.

Then in the course of time, the man came to slap upon the bass. And lo it was funky.

And God heard this funkiness and He said, "Go man, go." And it was good.

And more time passed, and, having little else to do, the man came to practice upon the bass. And lo, the man came to have upon him a great set of chops. And he did play faster and faster until the notes rippled like a breeze through the heavens.

And God heard this sound which sounded something like the wind, which He had created earlier. It also sounded something like the movement of furniture, which He hadn't even created yet, and He was not so pleased. And He spoke to the man, saying "Don't do that!"

Now the man heard the voice of God, but he was so excited about his new ability that he slapped upon the bass a blizzard of funky notes. And the heavens shook with the sound, and the Angels ran about in confusion. (Some of the Angels started to dance, but that's another story.)

And God heard this - how could He miss it - and lo He became Bugged. And He spoke to the man, and He said, "Listen man, if I wanted Jimi Hendrix I would have created the guitar. Stick to the bass parts."

And the man heard the voice of God, and he knew not to mess with it. But now he had upon him a passion for playing fast and high. The man took the frets off of the bass which God had created. And the man did slide his fingers upon the fretless fingerboard and play melodies high upon the neck. And, in his excitement, the man did forget the commandment of the Lord, and he played a frenzy of high melodies and blindingly fast licks. And the heavens rocked with the assault and the earth shook, rattled and rolled.

Now God's wrath was great. And His voice was thunder as He spoke to the man.

And He said, "O.K. for you, pal. You have not heeded My word. Lo, I shall create a soprano saxophone and it shall play higher than you can even think of."

"And from out of the chaos I shall bring forth the drums. And they shall play so many notes thine head shall ache, and I shall make you to always stand next to the drummer."

"You think you're loud? I shall create a stack of Marshall guitar amps to make thine ears bleed. And I shall send down upon the earth other instruments, and lo, they shall all be able to play higher and faster than the bass."

"And for all the days of man, your curse shall be this; that all the other musicians shall look to you, the bass player, for the low notes. And if you play too high or fast all the other musicians shall say "Wow" but really they shall hate it. And they shall tell you you're ready for your solo career, and find other bass players for their bands. And for all your days if you want to play your fancy licks you shall have to sneak them in like a thief in the night."

"And if you finally do get to play a solo, everyone shall leave the bandstand and go to the bar for a drink."

And it was so.

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Some More Tips

I've met a flood of people recently who are keen in learning singing tips, tricks and techniques that will help improve their quality of singing. The truth is, most people don't want to 'learn' anything. They want a quick fix. They want instant gratification. Something that will instantaneously transform their vocal abilities into what they envision only in their dreams.

Now don't get me wrong ...dreams are a good thing. We all need something to strive for. After all, it's all about passion. But we have to start somewhere. We have to do a little bit of the 'right stuff' everyday to then eventually see our progress.

Singing is like a musical extension of your natural speaking voice. The only difference is, you gotta' learn some techniques which will allow you to a) not damage your vocal chords ...and b) to sing the best you possibly can.

This is regardless whether you're trying to be the next Whitney Houston ...or if you're simply tyring to get to the next level.



*Breath Control*

You shouldn't be taking in gulps of air when you're singing. This is the wrong approach. Take 'sips' instead. Take what is required - a sufficient amount of air. There is nothing worse then feeling giddy because you're taking unnecessary deep breaths.

Also, don't hold your breath when singing.... EVER. This only wastes energy - which you could use on things like performance and tone control.



Use Tone Control

Forcing out notes to make them sound louder is a common mistake amongst aspiring singers. What you should aim to do is use (what we call) 'vocal resonance'.

Stay with me here.

Don't get put off by the term 'resonance'. All this means is that we can use certain parts of our upper body to amplify (ie. make louder or richer) our singing tone.

So, for example we can use our chest to amplify a lower notes for a more robust sound. Or, we can use our head to reinforce the more higher or 'nasal' sound.

As you aim to sing higher, try to use your head to create a bigger sound. As you go for a more lower sound, try to use your chest to make that sound richer.



Forget About Increasing Your Vocal Range Initially - Strengthen it!

Ah, I think the most common misconception is that you can improve your vocal range by another octave (ie. 8 notes). This is rarely the case. The truth is generally most people who take singing lessons will not drastically increase their vocal range. They may get an extra two or three notes, but usually this won't change much.

BUT, this should NOT be your focus.

Your focus should be to actually strengthen the voice across it's 'whole range' ...from the lowest notes to the highest notes.

Quite often people will use the 'middle' of their vocal range completely neglecting the lower or the higher parts. They're blissfully unaware that there is another world of 'notes' to be discovered! And it's these notes that we can work on... thus strengthening your entire vocal range. Not just the middle part.

The Priest Joke

Created by nebuchadnezzar

This is the most vicious shaggy dog story I've ever heard. I nearly killed a man over this. Use with caution, and more importantly, on people smaller than you.
A man is driving down a deserted country road when his car suddenly breaks down. He gets out and starts walking until he encounters a monastery. He knocks on the door and is let in by a little old priest. The priest takes the man in, giving him a place to stay for the night.

As the man is lying in his bed, he suddenly hears beautiful singing. It is the most beautiful sound he had ever heard, and it is emanating from somewhere within the monastery. He gets out of bed and searches the monastery for the rest of the night, but with no luck.

In the morning, as he is leaving the monastery, he asks the old priest, "What was the source of that beautiful singing? I searched for it all night but couldn't find it. Please tell me, I have to know!"

The priest responds, "I can't tell you that--you're not a priest."

Finding the source of the beautiful sound becomes the man's obsession, and so he decides to become a priest. He goes to a seminary and studies for years and years in order to become a priest. Finally, on the day he is ordained, he drives full speed back to the monastery. He knocks on the door and the old priest answers.

The man says to the old priest, "Now that I'm a priest, can you tell me the source of that beautiful singing?"

The old priest says, "Yes, take this key. The source is behind that door."

So the man unlocks the door and sees before him--an immense staircase, leading up so high he can't see the top, and so steep it's almost impossible to climb. So he starts climbing the staircase, he almost trips, he almost falls, he almost trips, he almost falls, and he finally gets to the top, where he finds a door--and it's locked. So he climbs back down the staircase, he almost falls, he almost trips, he almost falls, he almost trips, and he says to the old priest, "There's a door up there, and it's locked. Can I have the key?"

And the old priest says, "Of course! I forgot. Here is the key."

So the man climbs the staircase, he almost trips, he almost falls, he almost trips, he almost falls, he comes to the door, unlocks it, opens it, and sees before him--a vast forest. So he starts crossing the forest, he almost gets eaten by bears, he almost gets bitten by wolves, and he finally gets to the end of the forest where he finds a door--and it's locked. So he goes back through the forest, he almost gets bitten by wolves, he almost gets eaten by bears, he goes back down the staircase, he almost falls, he almost trips, he almost falls, he almost trips, and he says to the old priest, "There's a door up there, and it's locked. Can I have the key?"

And the old priest says, "Of course! I forgot. Here is the key."

So the man climbs the staircase, he almost trips, he almost falls, he almost trips, he almost falls, he crosses the forest, he almost gets eaten by bears, he almost gets bitten by wolves, he comes to the door, unlocks it, opens it, and sees before him--a huge ocean. So he goes back into the forest and collects some wood to make a raft. He gets on his raft and starts crossing the sea, he almost gets eaten by sharks, he almost gets stung by jellyfish, he almost DROWNS, and he finally gets to the other side of the ocean where he finds a door--and it's locked. So he goes back across the ocean, he almost DROWNS, he almost gets stung by jellyfish, he almost gets eaten by sharks, he goes back through the forest, he almost gets bitten by wolves, he almost gets eaten by bears, he goes back down the staircase, he almost falls, he almost trips, he almost falls, he almost trips, and he says to the old priest, "There's a door up there, and it's locked. Can I have the key?"

And the old priest says, "Of course! I forgot. Here is the key."

So the man climbs the staircase, he almost trips, he almost falls, he almost trips, he almost falls, he crosses the forest, he almost gets eaten by bears, he almost gets bitten by wolves, he gets on his raft and crosses the sea, he almost gets eaten by sharks, he almost gets stung by jellyfish, he almost DROWNS, he comes to the door, unlocks it, opens it, and sees before him--a huge desert. So he starts crossing the desert, he has to walk through sandstorms, he almost dies of thirst, and he finally gets to the end of the desert where he finds a door--and it's locked. So he goes back across the desert, he almost dies of thirst, he has to walk through sandstorms, he goes back across the ocean, he almost DROWNS, he almost gets stung by jellyfish, he almost gets eaten by sharks, he goes back through the forest, he almost gets bitten by wolves, he almost gets eaten by bears, he goes back down the staircase, he almost falls, he almost trips, he almost falls, he almost trips, and he says to the old priest, "There's a door up there, and it's locked. Can I have the key?"

And the old priest says, "Of course! I forgot. Here is the key."

So the man climbs the staircase, he almost trips, he almost falls, he almost trips, he almost falls, he crosses the forest, he almost gets eaten by bears, he almost gets bitten by wolves, he gets on his raft and crosses the sea, he almost gets eaten by sharks, he almost gets stung by jellyfish, he almost DROWNS, he crosses the desert, he has to walk through sandstorms, he almost dies of thirst, he comes to the door, unlocks it, opens it, and sees before him--an immense mountain. So he starts climbing the mountain, he almost gets crushed by avalanches, he almost FALLS OFF, and he finally gets to the top of the mountain where he finds a little hut. He can hear the beautiful singing coming from the hut right in front of him--but the door is locked. So he goes back down the mountain, he almost FALLS OFF, he almost gets crushed by avalanches, he goes back across the desert, he almost dies of thirst, he has to walk through sandstorms, he goes back across the ocean, he almost DROWNS, he almost gets stung by jellyfish, he almost gets eaten by sharks, he goes back through the forest, he almost gets bitten by wolves, he almost gets eaten by bears, he goes back down the staircase, he almost falls, he almost trips, he almost falls, he almost trips, and he says to the old priest, "There's a hut up there with the source of that beautiful sound in it, but it's locked. PLEASE, can I have the key?"

And the old priest says, "Of course! I forgot. Here is the key."

So the man climbs the staircase, he almost trips, he almost falls, he almost trips, he almost falls, he crosses the forest, he almost gets eaten by bears, he almost gets bitten by wolves, he gets on his raft and crosses the sea, he almost gets eaten by sharks, he almost gets stung by jellyfish, he almost DROWNS, he crosses the desert, he has to walk through sandstorms, he almost dies of thirst, he comes to the door, unlocks it, opens it, and sees before him--an immense mountain. So he starts climbing the mountain, he almost gets crushed by avalanches, he almost FALLS OFF, and he finally gets to the top of the mountain where he finds a little hut. The can hear the beautiful singing coming from the hut right in front of him. He puts the key in the lock, turns it, opens the door, and there in front of him is the source of the singing.

Now pause and wait for your audience to ask: "WHAT WAS IT?"
I can't tell you that--you're not a priest!
(Now run like hell.)

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